A Transition

As teenagers we take everything lightly, every action not given much thought, every word uttered with not much filter and care.

There is some kind of gradual, yet distinct transition as to when the teenager starts acting like an adult. The usual bubbliness lessens until we barely talk, we start to take matters at mind, starting to have sort-of deep questions about the world. Maybe this won’t happen to you, but right now, I feel it happen to me.

It’s a crazy feeling, a little bit uncomfortable yet all the while exhilarating. The feeling of taking control over things. The feeling of being charge of my own mind — in another sense, in which where we grow to think we are now capable of making decisions on our own. Yet there are times we completely lose this control, we let go of this feeling of adulthood, and somehow lapse back to that carefree teenager that all wants to do is to go outside and party and socialize.

That’s okay. That’s normal — as normal as I can guess.

There are certain times I experience drawbacks. A feeling of being too childish, yet sometimes I feel like I burden myself too much. That’s also normal, since in my age, 17, I’m barely legal (um..) yet I have quite made it clear that my mindset has not been in par with my actual age.

It’s fun to let loose, to let that bubbly, fun-loving part of you take over for a while. But then when it’s time to face the reality, it strips us of the proper preparation. That’s what I always fear most.

These days I feel these sensations run through me, a part wanting to be proper and do what I have to do on my own, and another part wanting only to lounge in bed all day and watch my favorite chick flicks and drool over actors and actresses whom I’ve gone to love.

A part of me finds the latter attitude acceptable, yet also — again — a part of me beckons me to be more responsible.

I have my goals in clear view in front of me. The problem is how to get to it.

Yet we must not forget that apart from the destination, the adventure, the journey to get through there is as much important and meaningful. Enjoy the ride, no matter how crazy it may get, how crazy it may feel. One day you’ll feel 16, giggling over some rock band member’s new HD photos off twitter. And one day you’ll feel like a professional blogger/writer, writing for some high-end, fashionista magazine, walking head held high and everything she needed in her disposal, all of this in preparation for her dream, for her goal.

Don’t forget what you’re waking up for, don’t forget what you want, but most of all, never forget that everything along the way matters, too.

Be spontaneous. Be in-the-moment. Adjust to these sensations of childishness and adulthood and find yourself climbing up your stairway to success in which every step has meaning, every step was fun.

Every step was a lifelong memory.


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